Mags: Grazia gazing... I'm starved!

If you're feeling rather Teletubby-like after a week or two of festive over-indulgence, or, at the opposite end of the mental scale, regularly entertain anorexic-type thoughts, be warned: Grazia has a severe case of body dysmorphia.

Trumpeting Nicole Richie's rise above the "curse" of size zero, the mag is excited to report the former fatty-come-anorexic is now a healthy (and "curvy") 50kgs, thanks to baby Harlow and supportive hubby Joel:

"Glowing with health, the 27-year-old was happy to show off her curvy body as she kayaked... while on holiday in Hawaii."

Grazia gets a 'friend' of Nicole's to conveniently say what they're thinking (like a fun game of 'This Is Your Life', according to Grazia): "Nicole is right on target now at 50kg. She's the healthiest she's been in her whole life and it's all down to Joel's positive influence and rules..."

When she was "considerably curvier" circa 2004, Grazia tells us the 164cm celebrity mum weighed in at a whopping 63kg. But now, according to Grazia's inside sources, she's stopped skipping meals and eats six times a day. The 'friend' ads that Nicole has been taking cooking classes, while she's also taken to thrice-weekly Kundalini yoga classes and long walks.

I'm all for Richie's positive body transformation (having experienced a year in the life of her body morphed with Madonna's, I can tell you thin ain't all fashionable fun and glamorous games) but do wonder whether it's helpful for a glossy to champion 50kgs on a 164cm frame as a body ideal for young women to aspire to (my dietician would think not – 50kgs being at the low end of the BMI scale).

But perhaps more unhelpful is the breakout that accompanies the story, 'The ever expanding thin list', which shows us pictures of Lindsay Lohan, Lara Flynn Boyle, Rachel Zoe, Shenae Grimes, Jessica Stroup, Taylor Momsen and Allegra Versace at their thinnest, which, though perhaps unintentionally, reinforces the glamour of thin (five of the girls are in red-carpet frocks).

Flick over a couple of pages, and Grazia's thin celebrity obsession continues with Victoria Beckham and her rib cage ('Too Posh for Pudding' - okay, clever headline), then we get saggy old Donatella Versace in a bikini, and page after page of stick-thin model in the fashion pages (who are, apparently, "the beautiful faces set to define the next year of fashion").

Then, to further enhance your New Year slim-is-in mindset, there's 'The Great Diet Cheat Sheet', which helpfully gives us a rundown of the latest and greatest diet regimes (only diet every other day; have five different tastes in every meal; keep treats to 100 calories; use the carb ladder; learn the five-minute breakfast; master a six-minute workout; rationalise your cravings).

Thankfully, columnist Matthew Evans is on hand to remind us that food consumption can be a pleasurable activity more about taste, variety and getting one's fill than self-flagellating, restrictive regimes.

On an even more positive note, the glossy weekly seems to have hit its catwalk stride with its first issue for 2009. Nothing too 'old news' and lots of fashion inspiration. It's also fairly ad (calorie) free, making it good value for your five bucks (in relative terms, of course – it only costs $1.40 a day to feed a World Vision child, after all – oh, the irony).

THE GLOSSARY
The good bits: Edwina McCann's column on humiliating maxi dress moments; Sarah Reid on Elle Macpherson's shameless self-promotion (a bit of an editorial backflip for Grazia, which usually praises Macpherson and her like); Alpha Delta, four pages devoted to the lovely 24-year-old diva; The Big Red Roadtest (Maxine Frith in a pair of Louboutins); Are You Smarter Than a Fashionista (feel fashion-smart and take the quiz!); Melissa Hoyer on Tim Gunn; Lucinda Pitt on ghd beauty crimes; Matthew Evans 'Out of the pantry!'; take a trip to Zanzibar and Bali; Grazia's New York and London columns; FHM editor Ben Smithurst's week of 'yes'; and the 411 on Rosario Dawson.
Blink and skip it: How Nicole Got Her Groove Back; Too Posh for Pudding; the vacuous star sign special; skinny models in fashion pages; the 'Hangover Heaven' accessories shoot (seriously, hangovers as glamorous?); The Great Diet Cheat Sheet (I know you'll read it anyway).
Pretty pages: 'Style Dash', 'A Model Wardrobe' (Aussie model special), Delta Goodrem.
Glossy posse: Chloe Sevigny, Chelsey Davy, Delta Goodrem, J.Lo, Gabriella Cilmi, Katie Holmes, The Veronicas, Elle Macpherson, Paris Hilton, Madonna, Agyness Deyn...
Glossy stats: Issue 24 (Jan 12, 2009); $5; 108 pages
Glossy bosses: Alison Veness-McGourty; ACP Magazines
Glossy ads: Just Cavalli, Hilfiger, ghd, Harper's Bazaar...
Glossy rating: 2

Yours truly,
Girl With a Satchel

P.S. GWAS' new (simpler) glossy rating structure can be seen in the sidebar, but I've also posted it below for you. If you have any suggestions about how to make the mag reviews more appealing, be my guest (please play nice!).

GWAS GLOSSY RATING
A glossy magazine worth spending your pocket money on?

1 - No... for the sake of your brain cells. Borrow a book instead.
2 - Perhaps not... preserve your self-esteem; buy a sweet treat.
3 - Possibly... worth a flick but not your lunch money.
4 - Yes... skim at your leisure then lend to a friend.
5 - Definitely... consider it a secure glossy investment.